Forget about crackers!
by Becky Barrett
Summary: [Disneyland: Walt Disney’s Enchanted Tiki Room: Under Mew Management][IagoхZazu] Iago has a lot of things that he wishes to keep secret from fellow Tiki Room birds and Zazu.


**Disclaimer:** Everything, including my soul, belongs to Disney. I'm just having fun with it. I'll put it back, I promise!

* * *

**Forget about crackers!**

Late as always, Iago got to the Tiki Room when run-through was already over. But all the birds were still there, sitting on their perches and jabbering that was not too far from singing by the sound of it.

Iago nodded to every bird and flower that turned to him with a greeting as he flew in and settled atop his perch near the enchanted fountain.

Tiki statues seemed to be asleep, or at least didn't try to bite his tale off immediately. Iago still could not socialize with them without breaking into the argument, though it's been quite a while since the unpleasant "moron tiki gods" incident.

José, Michael, Fritz and Pierre were busy talking with the glamorous bird mobile members, dazzling white female parrots; glee clubbers were chatting merrily about upcoming performances, but there was no trace of Zazu.

After making a mental note to himself not to forget to deduct a certain amount of money from everyone's wages for squandering precious time without rehearsing, Iago looked around for his co-owner.

Soon Iago spotted him - in a dimly lit corner of room, amongst small white birds, apparently new chorus line singers, that seemed to be strangely familiar.

Oh shit. It could not be.

But Iago had never been on good terms with lady Fate, so it truly was - an unpleasant blast from the past, stupid birds that lived in the royal golden cage of Sultan's palace. Stupid birds that witnessed all of his embarrassment – and all those goddamn crackers!

And with all that fancy being "big cele-birdy" talk he could not, by no means, let them spill the beans. He had to act fast. Fly fast.

A lively conversation that was held between the white birds and Zazu came to an unpleasant silence when Iago landed near them.

- Just what do you think you're doing?! You're all fired! Out! Scram! Shoo! – Iago pushed the birds off the ledge quite rudely, and they vociferated, offended, but still disappeared in the twilight beyond the doors rather quickly.

When the last white birdie left that room, unnoticed by rather occupied Tiki Room members, Iago sighed deeply and turned to the questioning look of his partner.

- Don't you say a word! 'Cause whatever they told you about those crackers is complete rubbish! – he blurted out, still fuming.

Zazu slightly tilted his head to the left, looking at him curiously.

- Actually, Iago, we were not talking about crackers.

- No? - Iago looked so dumbfound that Zazu found it very difficult to hide a huge grin that was spreading across his break almost unconsciously.

- No, - Zazu shook his head and let out a little devious smile, - We were talking about flamingos. You know, pink ones. They really do like you, Iago, especially when you imitate a princess's voice, don't they?

- Oh those little brats... - Iago took a deep breath and a Zazu thought that he was certainly wrong assuming that he had learned all of Iago's lexicon, - …and feed them to the Tiki gods!

- Have you finished? – asked Zazu patently, with some frosty notes in his tone, as if he was a parent and Iago was a child, who begged for buying a fabulous, thus extremely expensive and absolutely useless enormous plush Mickey Mouse toy.

That, undoubtedly, was not an attitude Iago could put up with.

- Have I finished? Have **I** finished!? **I** haven't even **started** yet!

-Everyone's looking at you, Iago, - said Zazu faintly.

So much for not letting everyone know.

He froze, and for a couple of moments listened to the stunning stillness. He could feel with every single back feather that everybody in the room was staring at him in bewilderment.

Iago cleared his throat, smoothing his head feathers with his wing, and turned to the waiting audience.

- What are you gaping at? Rehearse the show, loafers, or I'll sell you for stuffing and you'll spend the rest of your days in natural history museum! – Iago started his short speech rather calmly, but in the end he was shouting once again.

Birds didn't wait for him to continue the abuse, and soon the room was full of tweeting.

Zazu and Iago sited on the ledge for some time, silent. Finally, Zazu spoke:

- So... What about those crackers?

- Forget about crackers!

- No, really. I'm your partner, - Zazu felt silent for a few brief moments, obviously doubting his next words. Finally, he spoke in a hesitating voice, - I'm your friend. You can tell me.

- What part of "No" don't you understand, _partner_?! Is it "n" or "o" of maybe exclamation mark?! – Iago exploded, gesticulating furiously.

- Oh… - Zazu turned away, glancing at Iago over his shoulder, and sounded hurt, - If you don't want to tell me, it's fine. I can understand. I shouldn't have mentioned that flamingo, ether.

Iago hated his co-owner for being so sensible. After all, it was his fault and his chump attitude!

Trying his best to convince himself that he is doing this only because depressed Zazu wound scare off all the audience and the show will go bankrupt, Iago managed to say:

- Oh, come on! Some other time, will that be fine? In a _friendlier_ atmosphere.

- That would be really nice, Iago, – Zazu smiled as he turned to face parrot, - Shouldn't we join the run-through?


End file.
